Falling with the rain | Sristi Pramanik

Romanticizing rain is something

I happened to always refuse.

Rather, I remained as a bystander

to how it always found its place

in rhythms, quills, paintbrushes

and people's reminiscent muse,

or in resonating with every unfallen teardrop

as a grieving soul silently frays.

Then why did today's afternoon drizzle

evoke thoughts I'm supposed to betray?

Why did last night's sudden storm

nettle the void obscured in fret?

The very void that has buried much more

than what it loses everyday;

memories that birthed a heartbroken love,

debatably labelled as "regret".

When I have never associated myself

or my emotions with nature's brilliant ways,

why has it chosen to embrace me

and empathize with my unsettling pain?

Is it because the last remaining way out

of the rubbles of our mutual disgrace,

is to retrace every precarious step of yours

mimicking the unpredictability of rain?

The clouds growl with their thundering scowl

and remind me of the depth of your promises.

The lightning splits the cascading canvas

and sparks endless anecdotes of our tale.

A tale - where we try to stay afar

pained from each other until one of us notices,

that it's worth knotting an already knotted bond

yet again, because "maybe this time, we won't fail."

Well then, is this the time we fail?

For the rain seems ever so eloquent

in showing that its uncertain arrival is why

your constant "come and go" now makes sense.

Yet I pine for you, I pine for the clouded sky,

regardless of destructive or pleasant,

but dare I ask you as I ask the erratic downpour -

Is this your anger, or your sheer indifference?