Things have changed from what they've been.
And my pain of repentance is in the world unseen.
My fascinations once brought me glee,
But now lost, they've left me full of apathy.
And now, like a lonely lover, I lament.
The choices I made yesterday, I repent.
I feel like I'm in a state of stupor.
My whole being, pervaded by a dreamy languor.
Time wears on,
It ticked away.
I tried catching up-
But I was led astray.
And since came the despondency, it's slowly creeping by,
Wickedly sneers at me, the Grim with its scythe.
Moments ago, my future was in sight,
Like the strongest allotrope of carbon—all clear and so very bright!
Though, now that I look at what lies ahead,
All I can see is gloom and murk.
Through memory lane, when I stride,
The yore of glory, I hark back to with pride.
I feel satiated; I feel gratified.
I reckoned the damage to be minor
Figured I might spare a glare-
Oh, wasn't that a grave error?
Poor pride had been stripped bare.
At myself,
this made me fret.
"Guillotine me", I thought.
Just rip off my head!
If there's one thing I fear, I fear oblivion.
And of my laxity, I predict repercussions.
Recklessness has robbed me-
I'm now doomed to be forgotten.
I've now become "a part of the crowd."
With a spurious smile, my wounds, I shroud.
I long to start all over again-
But that's just a whim.
A whim-
It's all in vain...
And there's no one, no one but myself to blame.
There are people who, for the moment, make me forget
All my pain and regret
But clearly, they too expect!
Can't unsee those eyes, glutted with hope...
But me? All I do is mope.
Help me, dear Lord! I'm stranded-
Stranded in a world of chaos and confusion,
Drowning the youth into
What do they call it? Depression?
And every night, I struggle to sleep.
I lay in bed
With nothing to do
Just lay in bed.
Staring at the ceiling
It's as dark as my world and as blank as my mind.
I wonder where life has brought me.
It makes me pretty uneasy—my malaise
It makes it really hard to breathe.
It fills my heart with anxiety.
And leaves the night bereft of sleep.
Leaves the night bereft of sleep.