Dressed in a blue skirt and a white collared crips shirt
My daddy dropped me at school every morning,
As pious as its corridors were,
something unspeakable took place years ago behind its hallowed walls
I aimed to get perfect ‘A’s and always be punctual in class
A little girl of six, fragile as a fresh flower treasured in a vase
Learned to draw straight margins on my notebook
Memorised all the prayers and sang in the choir group
Right after completing kindergarten, I was in the primary school building
Here teachers didn’t feed us lunch, nor did they tie our shoelaces
They took revision lessons faster than the speed of the wind
But I always managed to grasp it well, you know, I’ve remarkable genes
Maths, English, Hindi, I scored well in my semesters
But yet my life subjected me to a faith so sinister
"An obedient clever girl", is what my teachers used to call me
But none of them made me aware of the misfortune that was about to befall me
It was the last day of school before the Diwali vacation began
Children in blue sweaters, carrying bags heavier than society’s moral standards, ran
Everyone was excited and so was I,
Wanted to go back home to my mommy and paint crafted butterflies
But life doesn’t go as well as they show in the movies
My plans altered because the worst was before me
The meanest girl in my class crossed my way to the washroom door
She made me trip, fall, and land on the cold hard floor
She purposefully banged her steel bottle right into my head
My vision blurred and for a moment I felt nearly dead
Blood was splattered across my face
I just wanted to go back to my mom because she was my safest place
The meanest girl got scared upon seeing my bloodstain on her bottle and ran away
But not before she dragged me to one of the loo-compartments
and stacked a lock to my dismay
My blood and tears formed a cosmic chemical that did not hurt as much as not being able to go back home did
Can you imagine the plight and helplessness of a six-year-old bleeding kid?
For hours I was locked behind the washroom door
My head hurt more as I screamed for help
Hours passed but no one came to my rescue
But when someone did, I was misused
She opened the door and pulled me out
Wiped my face and looked at me with a strange doubt
I started to beg her to call my parents, to take me home
She made me drink water while she also made sure we were alone
She asked me my name, my class, and how I got stuck there
But my voice was muffled under my giant tears
She carried me in her arms and tried to comfort me
But all I wanted was to leave immediately
She said she would take me home if I stopped crying
My childish intuition couldn’t tell that she was lying
She told to me part my legs slowly
I didn’t realise her intentions were unholy
Never in my life had someone subjected me to such brutality
For that woman seemed to have lost her sanity
For several long, painful, minutes I was taken advantage of
While a strange woman murdered my childhood on the floor
I screamed when the pain was too hard to hide
She locked her morbid eyes with mine
My tears froze on my moist cheeks
My whole body was a broken temple on a Greek battleground
Words couldn’t escape my mouth
She was a monster without a doubt
I cried and begged her to let me go
When my fragile body started to bleed at her mercy
She wiped the blood off my thighs and pulled up my tights,
Threatened me to never speak a word about this
Little did she know,
I hadn't learned enough words to explain what just happened to me
At six, you only know the words to survive and reach home
I once again begged her to let me go
With one last monstrous look at my face, she let go of me
I picked up my backpack and ran as fast as I could,
Never once looking back
The pain radiating up to my abdomen
Slowly making its way to my brain
Little did I know back then that I was scarred
And no matter what I do, I'll always carry that hurt
In the form of trauma or nightmare
The worst memory of my existence will always stay with me
That night wrapped in the comfort of my mommy’s arm,
I didn’t really sleep right
At the tender age of six,
I understood what being broken truly felt like