We Have Failed, Haven't We? | Debahuti Borah

We have failed, haven't we?

Another wildflower

Plucked to be crushed,

Defeated, left to be dead

In the midst of a spring

Wandering about in full glee

Thundering colours of a wondrous world

That might have lost its sheen

On something - something -

We failed to understand.

On something - something -

I hope we do not always fail to understand.

Countless stars gleaming back at us

Was the perception of beauty,

A decade ago,

When you held my hand

And asked if my skin could shine

With some treatments

I have not heard of,

Nor did I have the heart to hear of.

We have failed, haven't we?

I thought I failed you,

Being born the wildflower I was -

Yellow-brown to the core,

While you 'dazzled'

In your whiteness

Like the sea shining with

Glitters on the waves

That passed by our feet

Every instance of our judgement

Not matching from the core,

As if my yellow-brown feet

Made the salty water a little murky.

I thought I failed you,

Being born the wildflower I was -

With my Mongoloid features

On my face

Flattening the roundness

Of the globe's standard of beauty;

I stood there

Watching you play football

With eyes that dimmed

With a smile that gleamed

Though with thin lips.

My hips though, weren't flat like my nose,

They rose to be curves

Like a mountain prostrating!

Objectification came in

Like a hurricane in the middle

Of a desert

Uncalled for. Uncanny. Uncomfortable

That it was,

I thought it was my fault -

Being born a wildflower I was.

Yellow-brown, flat nose,

Dimming eyes, prostrating curves -

I had failed you.

I had failed myself.

I had failed what Beauty of Spring

Stands strong for.

I was, after all, another wildflower

Growing in your backyard,

To be crushed, left to die,

Defeated,

For that Valentine's Day

You told me

I am not the flower that "shone" the fairest,

I am not the flower that could

Smell the Indian thalis well,

I am not the flower that could

See the seashells at our feet with my monolids,

I am but the flower

That could wrap up in hourglass dresses of pleasant shapes of beauty.

We have failed the wildflower

Inside me,

Haven't we?

Yet we go ahead and say,

"Hey! Spring is sprung

Let's enjoy the beauty

Of the world

Set by the yardsticks

Of photoshopped curves

And extended hair

And filtered skin

And magnified eyes.

Let's look for the flowers

We grow in our pots

And leave the wilderness to die

In the winters of judgement."

Yes, we have failed.

We have definitely failed.

For the wildflower in me is lost -

Lost in the rat race to "perfection"

While I never wanted to be in the race,

Yet the world judged me in this case.

Startled by beauty created by others,

I have failed at bringing my creation to the table.

Oh, the stereotypes!

Oh, the objectification!

Oh, the "normal" and the "abnormal" norms!

Oh, the hysteria, the hysteria!

The new normal changing

Every decade,

The old being tossed into a carton box

Every decade.

What on this earth

Is the new normal?

What on this earth

Is the perception of beauty?

What on this earth

Are the measures to measure my beauty -

Or the lack of it?

We have failed, haven't we?

Another wildflower

Plucked to be crushed,

Defeated, left to be dead.