THE FOLLOWING POEM WAS SELECTED IN WINGWORD POETRY PRIZE 2023 LONGLIST.
In the well furnished office, owned by my father ,
The walls of which constantly diffuse smells of materialism ,
I work like a machine .
I print bills , examine the colossal stock and record incessant transactions.
My mind does calculations better than any calculator.
I yell and curse my employees ,who I know despise me secretly.
Like a sacred ritual, I arrange the wet currency notes into the sturdy piles
And obediently hand them over to my father every evening.
Nothing pleases him more than money.
He grins and offers me my share
Which I always decline with an air of stoicism.
Money makes me nauseous.
It makes one servile and coward ,
Like a tamed bird always flying back haplessly to its cage.
In the first floor , I hastily eat my brunch .
It crunches of notes and coins .
In the second floor , I inhale the stale air ,
Being environed by the big coils of wires
And quickly rush back to the main office
Where the customers are heard pleading and yelling,
Transporters waiting impatiently for the receipts,
Cheque books which need to be signed and stamped.
At home , I often complain of insomnia and headache.
Monetary thoughts grip my neck constantly.
In dream , I encounter the big quagmires of wires .
I wake up tired like a criminal condemned to death.
Work keeps my temperament in check .
In the initial moments at my office every morning ,
When I’m allowed a few moments of privacy,
I reminisce about my old job
And my past academic life,
About the woman who no longer loves me.
I am told how blessed I’m and I reciprocate with a sigh.
In the middle of an exhausting day,
I escalate to the first floor abruptly.
There I stare at the heavily dusted fan
With complete absent mindedness,
And fancy myself to be hanged
By the most expensive piece of sturdy wire .
Down there , the noise accelerates
Regarding the goods which need to be despatched
To the places distant ,
And the fat ledgers which demand constant attentions
And then I quickly stride downstairs
To make all the necessary arrangements..