Glancing to the ceiling;
Next to the window,
half past noon;
Still in sheets.
Swaying, eyes to brain
back and forth again
in the beauty of naked silence resilient
Piling off the bed
in blues, with cracking beeps outside.
I stormed past the room
to the main door
digging the peep hole deep.
Prompting, my curtain drawn past
now seemed teary.
Running back to the room
I arrayed down, hiding my tissues within.
Unlatched my cosy live-in
prior the next wild knock planting.
In dimmed smile, ‘Namaste Dadaji’
escaped my lips.
Bowing down to his feet
I took my share of blessings.
Two familiar figures
with smirking face
infiltrated in bereft space of my shielding.
Defensive; My mum’s voice
pulled strings
all behind.
‘Uncle bhi aaye h’, demanding the welcome
to be refined.
Exchanging our gazes
I snapped down on floor sheets.
My gauged heart I stitched for years
felt the unease
Obliged to touch his feet,
My innocence, caged in resentment
Wondering, if this brush was enough
to recollect his past thunder-
the dusk; the sorry faces;
scent of grandma’s cremating remains
The endless faith taking me
to follow him blindfolded
Hastily, falling in a sea of nowhere
Waxed and probed with his filth hands
quenching his thirst
Sniffing clothes inside.
Panicked to save the physical me
leaving in lurch, how all terrified.
My flooded heart and weeping soul
so far I betrayed
Concealing back his gruesome sins
luring my world at stake
Suffocating inside, zipped lipped
alone for all these cold nude nights.
Wishing to ask him;
by all this, if he was satisfied-
Now getting back on my spine
I walked out of the room
With scratched old scars,
overfilled heart
finally clogging the aisle
to my lost elegant shine.