THE FOLLOWING POEM WAS SELECTED IN WINGWORD POETRY PRIZE 2023 LONGLIST.
I first heard sirens go off in
my brain, when I was just shy
of eight
and there was an earthquake
between my parents
the buildings collapsed
all around me, as I held
my mother's hand at 2 am
and slept at my neighbour's
dreary house
it felt like an emergency
but nobody cared
the second time, I was older
there was a curfew
around my lady parts
I couldn't look pretty
or celebrate my beauty
in front of a man
for what if he did
the unimaginable
but it happened anyway
in the confines of my own home
his hand reached for places I
hadn't yet explored
it felt like an emergency
but nobody cared
especially my parents
I'm an adult now
which means, I have lost count
of the times I’ve been wronged
it’s been too many times
my entire life's blueprint
has been a coy navigation
of minefields
and I am so tired
of carrying the weights of
my femininity
a state of emergency
is a constancy
in every woman's life
and I'm afraid I will never know
a normal day
Is this the only way?